By the time you read this I could very well actually be there, soaking up the five-star all-inclusive luxury! I chose Shandrani Resort & Spa because of the range of activities for our whole family – we are a mixed bag of readers in the shade and never-sit-stillers who wouldn’t dream of packing a book to go on holiday. I’m looking forward to snorkelling in the Blue Bay Marine Park and then scaring all the other golfers off the 9-hole golf course with my shocking and erratic golf swing. People like me should be banned from experimenting with unfamiliar sports whilst on foreign soil – too much of a liability.

I shall once again try to master the skill of water skiing, much to the hilarity of all the people in the boat; it’s a coming of age shocker, I used to be quite good and now I apparently look like the inspiration for a new fangled water-Zimmer frame. At least I will be able to take refuge in the evenings in the beautiful restaurants, fine dining, fine wines and a fine time. After a couple of days spent running around I will no doubt sign up to every type of massage available, in the hope of correcting all the pulled muscles and strains I will have received whilst taking myself away from the comfort zone of my writing desk. Bring it on! I will of course report back to let you know whether my expectations have been met.

These are my travel essentials, things that I’ve realised work for me or things that I’ve left behind and wished I hadn’t. The basic medicines have been the result of assuming I can get to a chemist to buy them when I arrive, only to find on landing that they’re in the middle of a festival, election or holiday, and all the chemists are closed for the foreseeable future. I take food, not in the manner of a bag lady or an over-weighted one, but as someone who knows that airline food is not for me and I hate having the tray etc in front of me for 3 hours. So, as I say, very personal but it might mean something to somebody!

1. Handkerchief – wet it on the plane and cover your nose with it and sleep. Your sinus is kept nice and damp and if you suffer, as I do, you’ll wonder why you never did it before.
2. Pashmina-style scarf. Perfect for covering shoulders in religious places, comfy head support whilst travelling by plane or bus or car (not if you’re the driver obviously). Keeps you warm, draught or light excluder…it is indispensable!
3. Food for the plane – not rubbish but proper food, sandwiches,salad,fruit. It stops your stomach getting that blown up empty feeling.
4. Headache tablets.
5. Diarolyte sachets – great for de-hydration
6. Rubber flip flops – multi-functional, waterproof, disposable, shoe.
7. Trainers. Even if you think you’re going to be on a beach the whole time there is always some reason to be well-shod.
8. Nit comb for young children, especially in hot climates.
9. Pens. I love giving them away to children (from poorer communities) and it’s better than money or sweets, even though they are likely to sell them anyway.
10 Driving Licence. Further proof of ID, such as photocopies of your passport – kept separately of course.

From a fun-gambler these tips are picked up from shows like Ocean’s Eleven, Entourage and The Hangover and frankly it always appears to help to have an arbitrary lucky talisman (especially if they are gifted in the memory department!), so lucky heather intact, you should first of all check out the dining facilities in the larger hotels and see what deals you can get by playing at their tables. The large casinos weren’t built by losers and the house will always win eventually, so you may as well enjoy the food and drink in between your gambling. You could always fit in a marriage as well if you wanted!

Don’t be overwhelmed by the numerous gambling options whether it’s the slot machines, the table games, the card games or the sports betting games. Make it a point to set a budget for play; for example, having a $100 limit on slot machines or $300 on card games and stick to it. You won’t be disappointed if you’ve stuck to your budget, enjoyed the experience and had fun trying to break the house.

As the old saying goes, “the only way to bring home a small fortune from Las Vegas, is to bring a large fortune with you”. Be aware that everything is set up to separate you from your money. So for example, you will never see a clock anywhere in a casino, you won’t be able to tell the time of day – it’s always the evening. Cashiers are really hard to find; the idea being that while you are wondering around looking for one something else will draw your attention.

Know the rules of engagement when you go to Las Vegas to gamble and you’ll have a much better time.